:Tales of Motherhood // by Mandy England:

Motherhood is not meant to be ventured alone. We were made for community- rejoicing in victories, embracing defeat- yet never alone. As one who finds new life in the stories of others I have invited a few mama's that have walked or are walking this path of motherhood to join us in this space. My hope is that you will find encouragement today- in this moment, right where you are.

Please welcome my sweet friend Mandy. I have loved Mandy's heart since before she became a mother. She is artistic and creative and beautiful inside and out. She has two little darlings and shares tidbits of their lives via instagram. Today she's going to share a piece of her journey that will encourage any mama in any stage of parenting. You will be blessed by her words. 

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Hi there! I'm Mandy... wife to my best friend, the gal behind Mandipidy, and mama to Sophie and Judah.



When my husband and I discovered that I was pregnant with Sophie, it was a complete surprise. Well... I guess not completely. I mean, can it really be a complete surprise if you are peeing on the stick? But you know what I mean. We were planning to wait a few more years before taking the plunge into parenthood... just one of our many lessons about the sovereignty of God. And as thrilled as we were about our baby from that first moment, I just didn't feel ready to be a mother. I knew that I was selfish, short-tempered, and impatient. More than that... I knew the kind of mother that I wanted to be for my children, and I saw myself falling incredibly short of that mark.

Well, being a mother hasn't miraculously made me the perfect woman for the job. I still have all those character flaws, and motherhood has only helped me discover other ones that I didn't even know I had. As a new mother, I was overwhelmed with my inadequacies. From my quick temper to the crazy pile of laundry, I felt completely insufficient. I needed focus. A simple goal to help me work on the most important things foremost... expressing love to my sweet family. And so I looked to God's Word and clung to this verse:

"A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands."

- Proverbs 14:1


So simple... be a builder, an encourager. Use building words, do building things, think building thoughts. My home was the people living in it, and it was my responsibility to build them up. It wasn't easy and it went against my nature, but it was a simple goal toward which I could strive.





Replacing "Don't touch that" with "Here, play with this", or "Please stop screaming" with "Can you use your lovely voice?" takes daily effort on my part. I make plenty of mistakes, for sure! But it is a simple filter through which I can run my actions and words...

BUILD MY HOME.

I designed this print recently so that I could keep the words around the house as a reminder, and I am sharing it with you in case you would like to do the same. Please feel free to print a copy for yourself or to share with a friend:





I hope that this post built you up today!


*linking up with carissa for miscellany monday

: a letter // to the mothers before me:

i do this every week, but with little ones there are always variables. one by one we head out to the garage and load up in that mini van i said i'd never own. i buckle the little two and look on, with bittersweetness,  as my big girl no longer needs my help with her seatbelt. the drive is about 10 miles and all the way we listen to books on cd while they interject questions, getting excited as we make our way past the bulldozers working on the roads.

i unload each little darling. the two bigger kids walk and baby girl rides in the stroller. the flags always catch their eyes and they say aloud, that's the american flag, that's the state flag. twice in the last while the one has flown at half mast raising many questions from their curious hearts.

they know the routine by heart now. we dump our books in the return shoot first, then the elevator. he pushes the outside button and she pushes the inside button. in reverse on our way out. i remind them on the short ride down to use quiet voices, no running and stay where mommy can see them.

this day the little man caught a whim and took off running through the back bookshelves. i could just see wisps of blonde locks as he went between them. eisley tried to be helpful and catch him which only turned into giggles and an outright game of chase. when i caught up with him i reminded him of our three rules and told him our time was up today. he was not happy.

we made our way to the checkout desk which is on the main floor where people are actually trying to study or read. the little guy was closing in on a melt down. he's three, it happens. with a twinge of panic i began handing our books to the librarian, all the while whispering assuring words to him in hopes of keeping him grounded. she quickly noticed that he was going downhill fast and grabbed a book he wanted, checked it out and looked at me and said, i've been there.

sigh. 
thank you.


To the mothers that have walked this road before me,

thank you for engaging my look of despair with a look of compassion.

thank you for acknowledging my daughter when she tells you she has lost a tooth. 

thank you for listening to her when she tells you she can count to one hundred and then proceeds to show you. 

thank you for waving back when she says hi even though you are clearly very busy.

thank you for helping me get the groceries out of my cart when you notice two little ones on foot and one strapped to my weary body. 

thank you for not saying,  you have your hands full, when i need to hear, you're doing okay. 

thank you for taking my buggy to the return stall. 

thank you for understanding i will most likely be late, to everything.

thank you for reminding me to cherish every moment, even the hard ones.

thank you for letting me tell you what you already know when you are caring for my children, because a mama just needs to hear herself say it. 

thank you for not making assumptions about my parenting skills, or lack thereof. 

thank you for taking time to stop us when we are out to tell us our children are well-behaved, because they aren't always. 

thank you for remembering you have walked this path before and all the things you wished someone had said to you. 

i am truly blessed by you.


*just writing with heather

:Tales of Motherhood // by Stephanie Holden:

Motherhood is not meant to be ventured alone. We were made for community- rejoicing in victories, embracing defeat- yet never alone. As one who finds new life in the stories of others I have invited a few mama's that have walked or are walking this path of motherhood to join us in this space. My hope is that you will find encouragement today- in this moment, right where you are.

Please welcome my sweet friend Stephanie. We met last year in Georgia and I asked her question after question about her journey, faith and family. She shared the beauty of her story woven into His with grace. I have turned over her words and passed them on to others many times. I am delighted for you to have a taste of His goodness in the words below.

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I'm so honored that Melissa has shared this space of hers with me today. Her heart and the way she uses words to express the things in her life are such an inspiration to me. I had the pleasure of meeting Melissa in person and spending a few days together getting to talk about life stuff and God stuff (which in essence are the same).  Our hearts gelled and I've loved her ever since.  When she asked me to share a few thoughts on motherhood I was delighted. This topic is so near and dear to my heart.  Being a grandmother now, I have a lifetime of experiences to share...which to choose?  I was so torn.

Until today that is when these pictures were texted to me.  

Meet my mom. She's the one on the right.

She is gonna turn 70  in just a couple of months and took the day off work with a couple of her co-workers to go zip lining. 

Anything that I could share about my experiences with my three grown daughters would be filtered through my experiences with her.   And as you can see from the picture....she is full of life.

 She is the spunkiest woman I know.  She recently ran her first 5K.  

Well...walk/ran her first 5k.  But still.....she set a goal and she did it!

She loves to live life.  She has her own iPhone and has joined the world of texting.  The reason why she did this?  Because me and my girls, her grand daughters, text throughout the day. Everyday. And she doesn't want to miss a thing.  Now all five of us group text each other and some of these convos are treasures...and quite hilarious.

I say all this not to brag on my momma....but to say her take on life has totally shaped who I am as a mom.....it has shaped my relationships with my girls.  Now, her way of living has not come easy....this ability of hers to love life and live with such passion and fun.

 No, she has gone through some rough valleys to learn this lesson of the preciousness of each day. She lost the love of her life, my daddy, at the age of 39.  He was 44. I watched her grieve something fierce and my heart broke as a 13 year old girl not being able to make things better for her. But life went on and I watched her choose to live....to learn to thrive in spite of a broken heart.  There were lots of stuff that happened along the way such as having her 16 yr old daughter tell her she's pregnant and watching one of her sons self destruct to drug addiction. And then death struck again when my other brother was killed in a car accident and she had to bury her son. He was only 39 years old.  Again, I felt helpless as her daughter, to fix things...to make her feel better. But some things can't be fixed.  They aren't meant to be fixed. We just have to learn how to live a new way.  

And that is what I have watched her do.  She keeps on living...it has been a hard road to endure but she has taught me by example what it means to cling to my Savior...to trust a Sovereign God even when I don't understand His ways.  To keep my heart from bitterness when what the Lord has chosen for me is not what I think is fair.  She has taught me how to still have joy in the midst of any circumstance.  

 She has shown me through the years to choose joy.

So now back to me as a mom.  I have three grown daughters.  

These were taken on  my middle daughter's wedding day last year.

 My people

Two are married and our youngest is getting married in September. I am entering the empty nest and now looking back on an entire chapter of  my life...of being their mom.  I think back on all the things I did to mess them up...things I should have done differently.  Wished I'd done differently.  I made some really dumb mistakes and yet still....my girls love me. They genuinely love being with me.  They are my best friends.

Why is that? It's not because of me being anything great or special. It was God's grace working in our family.  He is the difference that gives me the power  and ability I need to choose joy and cling to him during the difficult times of motherhood that seem hopeless.

And He gave me a living example of what this looks like in my mom.  

Whether I realized it at the time or not...her way of living, trickled down into my way of living and has saturated my girls way of living.  I now want to be that living example to my daughters and my three grandchildren of what it means to choose joy.

To live life a new way when all that we've known is gone.

To celebrate each day whether that looks like taking a day off of work to go zip lining on a Tuesday morning or just simply  having the strength to get out of bed  and be present in the lives of the ones I love when everything in me just wants to hide from the world and hope my problems go away.

Just like my mom,  I don't want to miss a thing.

This life we have been given is too precious and too brief to spend one moment wasting it not living.

And just like my mom, we are all leaving a legacy. How we live our life in front of our children will effect generations to come. 

It trickles down and saturates the lives of our grandchildren and great children....the good stuff and the bad stuff.  Now I will be the first to say that we never have to be in bondage to our pasts....those who were raised with abusive moms or in homes where addictive and destructive  behavior were prevalent  still have the ability through Christ to be victorious...nobody has to be victims of their pasts.  Victory is possible but it is much harder when those strongholds are still there...those high places that were never dealt with and destroyed.  That is not what I want to pass down to the next generation.  

And in this month when motherhood is honored,  I'm thankful for the mom the Lord chose for me. I'm thankful that her example has spilled over into many lives that she has touched....mainly mine.

I treasure what she has passed on to me.  It's greater than any inheritance I could receive.


My mom's legacy was teaching me the importance of choosing joy....to laugh often ...to just have fun in spite of "life".


I pray that whatever season you find yourself in that you will choose joy too.  Find something to laugh about.   Make someone else smile.


 It makes for a good life y'all.

                                                   




*linking up with carissa for miscellany monday

:what i'm into // april 2013:

i look back on this month through blurred lenses. the most recent past is often the hardest to recall. moments that stand out the most are those moments spent in the midst of a full house. april was a month for practicing hospitality. local and out of town guests adorned our table while their children delighted in the bliss of unchartered territory in our back yard. stories were shared around the fire, drinks around the table, laughter throughout our home. planning for may to look very similar as we continue this journey of practicing hospitality.

other things i've been into in the month of april....

read & reading
i finished an altar in the world by barbara brown taylor. i checked it out from the library but this is a book i must own. she discusses twelve practices to consider incorporating in every day life. all beautiful. all worthy of contemplation.

i also read the great gatsby by f. scott fitzgerald for the first time ever. i loved the imagery, feeling more than once, as though i was actually at one of gatsby's famous parties. the ending was truly sad and as one that needs closure, if you've read it you know why, i was a little disappointed.

i am currently reading bread and wine by shauna niequist and have been on the hunt for arborio rice to make her risotto. shauna paints beautiful pictures of moments in her life where food has played an unforgettable role.

next up is falling upward, a spirituality for the two halves of life by richard rohr and cold tangerines by shauna niequest. 

watching
we haven't had much time for movies but our current television addiction is breaking bad. i usually watch mad men while folding laundry or processing orders.

music
music remains pretty much the same. we typically start our mornings with sufjan steves for children or the praise baby collection on pandora. this seems to put our moods in the proper place as we get ready for the day ahead. if the children are outside playing i find myself listening to mumford & sons because they just never get old. workout radio is my go-to for getting me through my time on the elliptical and when i'm cooking dinner it's always frank sinatra or billie holiday.

excited
blown away, actually, by the response to these. 

anticipating
starting in May, in honor or mothers everywhere, i will be hosting a series {tales of motherhood}, where i have invited some pretty amazing mama's to share pieces of their journey to encourage the rest of us. we are not meant to do this alone- motherhood // lets do it together, mmmkay?


what are you into?

*linking up with the lovely leigh

:thoughts on motherhood // doing life together:

these are the days of cheerios and peanut butter and jelly, afternoon snacks and dinners half eaten. days of 7am wake up calls in the form of little ones with empty bellies. babies that reside on the hips of their mamas, while one handed tasks are mastered. these are the days of laundry that is never done and sinks rarely empty.

full days.
good and bad days.
the you-don't-have-to-do-it-alone-days.

we were made for community and doing life together. we were made for full kitchens and friends that know exactly where to find the silverware drawer. we were made for carrying each other burdens and babies on our shoulders.

i started pulling out plates from the cabinet with a clatter as little ones ran in and out of the door, not one remembering to shut it behind them. i looked around missing baby girl and found her held tight in the arms of my friend. she swayed back and forth as mamas do, letting my girl and the one that grows in her belly bond.

conversations went from schooling to housing to food and life with lots of babies in tow. our talks were interrupted and unfinished, as expected with eight little ones at foot. we pushed babies five deep on that old metal swing set. their smiles as wide as the ocean blue. wind sweeping locks of golden brown, red and blonde, to and fro.

disputes were settled and boo-boos were kissed.
small tokens were exchanged among friends as we said our good-byes.

when everyone was gone and the house back in order, our bodies fell heavy into the beanbags on the living room floor as we relished in the goodness of doing life together.




*joining emily for imperfect prose

:on being done with busy:

my eyes open slowly, heavy with sleep. i roll to the left and feel a twinge in my back, age forever taking it's toll. the clock reads 6:14am as the list begins to form in my mind. the days are full, morning til night there's the doing. our society says "effective people are busy people. religious people are busy people. for millions and millions of people, busy-ness is The Way of Life," Barbara Brown Taylor

i'm slowly learning not to fill my life with busy but to fill it with being. 

being a wife.

being a mom.

being a friend.

being a neighbor. 

just being. 

spending time with my husband after his long day at work. letting the house keeping slide on the weekends so there is more time to relish in us. time for kitchen kisses, moments of lingering around the fire sharing belly laughter. making memories with cartwheels and flips in the freshly mowed grass. dreaming the future together.

leaving space for sketches with the little ones around the table. letting them make cookies with extra chocolate chips and watching blue eyes squint with pleasure as they bite into the goodness made by their own hands. 

sticking a stamp on a hand written letter that will arrive at the perfect moment for that sweet friend. sharing stories over huge pots of coffee that grow cold as we get caught up in the glory of it all. 

finally taking time to deliver pumpkin bread to the neighbors. wrapped by tiny hands, delivered with love. letting them be jesus with skin on. showing them the way to acting just, loving mercy and walking humbly. for these little ones, they will be what they see. 

join me in leaving the busy and taking on the being.

*linking up with carissa for miscellany monday

:where it all begins and ends:

motherhood: all love begins and ends there

-robert browning

my mama tried to teach me to shag. i would watch her feet move to the rhythm while mine never matched up. she would laugh and twirl me around. that was my favorite part anyways. i never learned to shag, mama, but i still dance.

i turned the music loud this morning, an invitation they already recognize. they came running, tools in hand. for the little guy, his guitar gifted by a sweet aunt. for my girl, her ballerina doll, naturally.  the baby, just brought the cute, shaking her fluffy bottom. 

we danced and twirled and giggled at the freedom found in dancing like no one is watching. 

some days are ugly hard. some days are gloriously beautiful. today was the latter. glory.