:thoughts on motherhood // the fun mom project:

i've always been the more serious type. when friends were loud and crazy i was quiet and observant. a wall flower, you might say. however, people that laugh loud and like to be seen, have always fascinated me. i'm drawn to those people. the ones with the boldness to be fun. maybe that's why i married a fun one. he's playful and friendly. he has a signature high-five that both stings a little and welcomes you in, lets you know you're included. it says, with a slap, hey, you're cool, lets be friends. only fun people can pull off the high five. 

she sees this about daddy and loves it. the oldest, she's more like him in this way. she never meets a stranger and giggles deep from the belly with everyone she meets. the little two, they are always asking to go. go somewhere, anywhere. just go. 

me? i'm the lover of home and quiet. i crave a full table of food and friends and have a deep love for people but there comes a time when i need home. routine is my favorite. as a mom who stays at home and has chosen home education, there must be routine to keep us in check. 

so daily my children hear some of these things 

brush your teeth and get dressed

it's time for studies

clear your area

put away your toys

gather your books it's time for rest time

please do not say _________

is that being loving?

time for books and snuggles before bed

i am the routine keeper. the trainer of hearts and minds. 

daddy is home in the evenings and weekends. when he comes in the hallelujah chorus sings for all of us. he is truly the highlight of our day. he comes in and wrestles and tickles and laughs with our little ones. on the weekends they can stay in their jammies as long as they want to. he takes them on bike rides and hikes. daddy dates are their absolute favorite. 

so when eisley looked at me one day and said, mommy you're serious and daddy is crazy, i felt a twinge of disappointment but also the sting of truth. i baked cookies that day in an effort to push back against her perspective. daily i've been thoughtfully looking for ways for my children to see the fun side of me. 

during dress up time recently i had two princesses and a spiderman on my hands. the oldest princess said, mommy i wish you could dress up. though there were many things on my to-do list and routines to be kept, i did. i pulled out my wedding gown, and pranced around in my unmade-up face and unwashed hair and found that my little girl who sees me as serious, saw me as fun. even more so when she got to try on my dress. 

so in an effort to show my children moms are fun too, 

i will be documenting these moments via instagram. you can 

follow me // @melissabeaver and join in with the hashtag // #thefunmomproject.