My dad died when I was five. My mother played the role of both with all her might. I wrote a letter when I was young about how much I was missing without a dad. I think it crushed her because she was trying so hard to be both. She came to all of my athletic events. She supported me in every way possible. I don’t know how she did it alone. I applaud her. I admire her. She is super-mom.
Still the fact remains, I grew up fatherless and I longed for a male presence in my life.
When I met and fell in love with my husband I did not choose to fall in love with him because I thought he would be a great dad. I doubt those thoughts crossed my mind since at the time I wasn't sure I ever wanted to have children. We just loved each other fully and committed to do that for the rest of our lives.
Then the children came.
And he showed up- The Father I Never Had.
The father I longed for so many years ago. The father who plays with his kids when the sun rises until the sun sets. The father who gives grace to his children when mommy has run out. The father who redirects and distracts and never raises his voice. The father who hugs tight and kisses boo-boos and says ‘it’s okay to cry’ and ‘violence is never the answer’. The father who leads with gentleness and teaches by example. The father who loves their mother with passion and fervor. The father who makes the princess feel whole and the little guy feel strong. The father who reads books and plays cars and chase and snuggles and rock-rocks. The father who laughs and loves with all of his being.
In the words of Forrest Gump “I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is” and to me love is The Father I Never Knew.
*linking up with Supermom for Wordish Wednesday*