May 1, 2012

::what He whispers when my soul is weary::

the tiny one was restless all night, up before the sun at 5am for feeding. we snuggle and i look deep into her navy blue eyes, bonding. welding my heart to hers for eternity. a full belly and snuggles are her deepest needs at this moment. i am mommy and these needs are met.

my big girl has been fearful lately. darn you bad dreams. i relate to this fear stirred by dreams. my mind wanders to the stretch of time that i ran the little guy no more than an inch of bath water due to a dream that i could have sworn was reality. the one that woke me, sobbing and haunted me for months.

bare feet tapped the hard woods as she ran to the kitchen where i was making coffee, strong, through sleep filled eyes, ecstatic that she had made it through the night in her own bed, unafraid. 5:30am on the microwave clock. i explained the time and how she usually sleeps for at least two more hours. her longing to be near me pulled on my mama heart strings. to the couch with a blanket she goes.

i long for solitude.
i stake my claim on the wee morning hours as "me time."
time to refresh my sleep deprived soul. time to meet with Him. time to be filled so i can overflow.

this time i long for, invaded by my two precious girls.
i encourage more sleep for both of them knowing the value of a good-nights-sleep. the kind i fear i may never have again. i think grace. these are the moments i am challenged to give grace so i share my frustrations with god.

don't they know i neeeeed this time to be a good mommy?

and He speaks gently to my heart-

these are the moments that make you a good mommy.

*just writing with heather today


  1. Absolutely beautiful. Thanks for the tears and sweet reminder this morning.

  2. Oh so true, I type quiety as to not wake my own children, longing for this quiet time alone.


  3. How wonderful it is to have some time alone with ourselves and knowing that Someone up there count not how short that time was but how wonderful we felt afterwards.

  4. Very tender, and a good reminder. I often find myself weary of the "intrusions" into my precious and limited quiet time, it's good to remember these aren't intrusions at all.


words are like honey, sweet to my soul, so feel free to share yours.